Chapter 16: How to Make the Most of Your Decision

Summary

• The reader is encouraged to apply the decision-making process used for the 'baby decision' to other life choices, but without spending as much time on less impactful decisions.
• Values such as respect and understanding, which were hopefully developed while discussing the 'baby decision', are key for future decisions and conflicts.
• Whether choosing to be a parent or to be childfree, taking risks should continue to be a part of life, offering a sense of excitement and challenges for growth.
• Following the decision, it is important to visualize a successful future, picturing possible accomplishments and eventual happiness with the choice made.
• The chapter advises to 'steal' a little from the other choice - the one not selected - by incorporating some elements of what was given up, within practical limits of the made decision.
• As human, it is normal to feel some ambivalence, and so rather than trying to suppress it, learning to accept such doubts can better prepare one for future dilemmas.
• Spend time with others who have made the same decision as it can provide support, and also with those who made the opposite choice for continued growth and understanding.
• It's counter-productive to try to convince everyone that your choice should apply to them too; it often indicates that one might be trying to reinforce their own decision conflictingly.
• Announcements about the decision, be it to have a baby or remain childfree, can reinforce it while also inviting criticism, so it's important to be selective about who you share with.
• Reaching a definitive decision about parenthood can induce feelings of relief and accomplishment, while preparing for the next stage of life, whether that's having a child or redefining a childfree existence.