If Something Is Happening to Me, I Want to Be There

Summary

• The chapter is centered around a woman who is referred to as 'she', who is exploring her new found ability to be more direct and assertive in her actions.
• She rationalizes her newfound assertiveness and freedom in decision-making, attributing it to a revelation about the nature of the universal wave function and quantum physics.
• She boldly propositions Hugo, a man she appears to be attracted to, to share a room with her—despite his initial resistance.
• However, the intimate encounter with Hugo turns out to be disappointing for her and she finds herself lost in existential thought in the middle of it. This is suggested by a quote by Albert Camus that comes to mind: "I may have not been sure about what really did interest me, but I was absolutely sure about what didn’t."
• Another Camus quote also comes to mind, "If something is going to happen to me, I want to be there", which seems to reflect her desire to be a present and active participant in her own life and experiences.
• She concludes that Hugo is perhaps more self-centered and withdrawn than she had initially thought. She speculates that his behaviour could be attributed to living many different lives, resulting in a strong focus on self-intimacy or isolation.
• By the end of the chapter, she has left, indicating a premature end to their intimate encounter.